Disclaimer!
Due to our societal inability to allow Natural Selection to run its course, the Crag City Council has required us at Lighthouse Inc. to take certain precautions. While me and my fellow colleagues have always been firm in our belief that growing pains are necessary for the betterment of character, we also accept a certain percentage of the population, "literally just can't even right now". So, after five years of serious self-reflecting- and the threat of a bottomless pit- we are now motivated to provide our viewers with what can only be described as a trigger warning (we didn't want it, but it's happening).
Trigger Warning
On a daily basis, horrors like Olag-Masha and the Un-God Proxy try to deconstruct and subvert reality.
Since it is our mission to report and write on fragmented worlds, fantastical events, and beasts both grotesque and whimsical, it is inevitable (even expected) that something will upset you.
If you wish not to be upset; if you wish to avoid talks of sudden limb growth or spontaneous assaults by nonsensical phantoms, then go no further.
If you desire a pristine reality where all laws and people bend to you and your whimsy then woe! Woe to you and all people; let us be grateful you don't have gifts of an Elder God.
If you wish to cancel Lighthouse Inc. because you heard or saw something that didn't fit perfectly within your world view, and now you're having an immense breakdown capable of trembling Olympus itself, then please click:
However, if you would rather humor the uncanny and learn more about our crumbling world, than you've come to the right place! Feel free to explore and understand.
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The Nameless Princess of the Dark Woods
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I, R.J. Smithers, to the best of my ability, will present all the irrational facts regarding what lies just outside your door and in our local community.
Thank you, and remember: "Everything is Fine! You're not gonna die!"
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